I don’t know about your calendar but ours announces there are just four more sleeps to the big day. You know the one. Christmas Day. That one. There is simply no getting away from it - Christmas day is around four corners. The signs have been there since Halloween but now they are totally utterly and absolutely in your face.
Similar to the lists Santa likes to make, there are both good and bad signs that Chrimbo is almost here. I thought I’d start with the bad signs.
I know it’s Christmas when:
I approach the till in Eason’s sideways with a suspicious lump under my coat. Upon opening it, the contents spill all over the counter and I hiss at the startled shop assistant, “Quickkkkkkkk! Fire them into a bag before the kids appear!”
I become quite good at commando sign language where I jab two fingers at Mister Husband, then at my own face, wave them towards the kids and finish by denying that I did not just give him the finger in the book shop. I was just signing at him to “keep the kids away.”
I’m sick. Or the kids are. Or the dog is. The humans have a tummy bug. The dog ate some chocolate coins – including the wrappers and then savaged the advent calendars.
I can’t see the counter top for the lists. Lists. Lists everywhere.
I am fed up receiving phone calls from couriers looking for directions to my house.
I never thought I’d say it but……………...is that bloody Fairy Tale of New York again???? and could someone please tell George Michael, it’s gave and not “geve you my heart?”
Home and Way is over until January.
I have the fear. The fear that I will forget someone. Or something.
And then there are the good signs. The very good signs.
There’s mountains of chocolate in the house and rivers of wine.
The stairs are strangled under fairy lights.
There are two thousand three hundred and twelve batteries in the bowl on the counter.
Brussel sprouts are the Veg de Jour
There’s 4 sleeps left on the advent calendar
I’ve got Vienetta in the fridge!
The boys get their Christmas holidays tomorrow! Two whole weeks of rest time.
I’ve got premixed gin and tonics in the fridge!
All of my shopping is complete.
Most of my presents have been distributed.
It really is almost here. It really is. Happy Christmas everyone!
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