Friday 9 August 2013

Stuff I Said This Week

Sometimes I sound like a broken record.  And sometimes I like to shake it up a bit.  Y’know, keep ‘em on their runner clad toes.  Keeps it interesting. 

I’ve heard it said that if you hear the same order/instruction all of the time, you tune out.  I know this is true.    

On an average week I say stop! only about eleventy billion times.  Ok, strictly I don’t say it.  More like screech it at the top of my broken vocal chords.

Get off your brother/s! would be another oft repeated order.  Again louder than a whisper.

I think no! speaks for itself. 

Pretty much par for the course, I think you’ll agree.  This week I came out with some others.   
These are the printables!

Leave the dog alone!

Bollix!  So much so actually that now Smallest Boys says “bogg-ix” at the drop of a hat.

Stop licking the floor!  (Yes.  I said that.)


Get out of the bathroom!

Stop swinging out of the curtains.

Get down off the roof of the van!

No!  You absolutely cannot have a bloody treat!  You don’t deserve one.  (And ten minutes later)  Here!  Take the shaggin’ ice-cream and eat it. When it’s gone, it’s gone!

Who took my scissors?  I want it back. Now!

Don’t walk on the dog!

Put your brother down!

Is that poo on the floor?  Tell me that is not poo on the floor.  Don’tletthedogeatit!

Look!  Look at those men searching for their balls!  (We were driving past a golf links at the time.)

Take your hand out of the dog’s mouth!

Don’t wake your little brother. 

Liam!  (I have lost count of the number of times I called him.  I know deafness isn’t a joke but I was this close to losing my remaining marbles)

Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease stop shouting.  I! Said! Stop! Shouting!  Do you hear me? 

Don’t touch my bag! 

Don’t run! Come back!

Don’t wee on the floor!

Leave me alone!

Don’t eat the dirt!

Don’t put that crayon up the dogs bum!  Why????  Why?????  Just don’t!!

Don’t do your wee’s on the grass!

Quick!  Wee up against the wall.  Go on!  No-one will see you!

My favourite one would have to be:  He is a girl.  She’s just dressed like a boy. May god forgive me but I was trying to get some girls in the park to let Lovely Liam into “their” tree house.  I hope he’ll forgive me.

I have also said “yes,” a lot this week, there were plenty of “of course’s,” a few “if you would like to’s,” tonnes of “I love you, too’s,” a couple of “absolutely’s,” and maybe one or two, “Do you know school starts back in 3 weeks?”

That one was probably the meanest!


  1. Sounds very like my house - also I can comment. *Happy Dance*
    This week included stuff like:
    No guns at the table and take your toe out of your brother's nose.
    I love them really....

  2. Will this comment make it? Will it delete all other comments? Please let it work!!!! Anyway, I LOVE your new blog design, very fancy and very fresh! I know you've been stalking me and writing down everything I say every day and that's where you got the content for this post ;). I forgive you.

  3. Thank you so much for your feedback. I am delighted beyone words that people can now comment. I was feeling decidedly THICK when I wasn't able to/didn't know how to fix it! Joanna, I have minnions EVERYWHERE.

  4. At last I can comment! I love your posts, sometimes think I should just make a tape - 'stop that/pick that up/who left this here?'

  5. Love it! And what is it with the scissors? I have been saying for three weeks now "guys where's the scissors" . Maybe there is a black market exchange between kids going on somewhere....
    Any yay for being able to comment!