Monday 28 January 2013

The Top 40

So Sainsbury’s recently conducted a survey asking the sum total of 2000 mums what they considered to be their Feel Good factors.  Some weird things were mentioned like cheese (I know!) bubble baths, (who has the time for those any more) the old reliables like flowers and chocolates and the obligatory saucy knickers (please!) also got a mention.

I felt a tad condescended upon so I decided to go and have a look for myself. 

The following are their findings.  My replies would be in red.

  1. A partner gives you a cuddle spontaneously (Eh, no!  Why?  What are they after? )
  2. Comfortable underwear (In other words, granny knickers.  Nothing “good” about that)
  3. Someone tells you that you’ve lost weight (Implying you were/are fat in the first place)
  4. Buying a present for someone which they’re obviously pleased to receive (But you could have saved money had you not needed to buy it in the first place)
  5. Sexy underwear (Eh, wrong again.  Sexy underwear includes push up bras and dental floss knickers.  Your boobs were never intended to be way up under your chin/s and arse floss is not comfortable!  Victoria Secret models smile because they are paid mega bucks to, not because their “wonderpants” are comfortable!) 
  6. Finding a bargain (Coz no-one else wants it. That’s why it’s a bargain)
  7. Receiving flowers (Hhmmmm, maybe.)
  8. Being bought a present (ok, might have to give you that one)
  9. Someone tells you that you look younger than you are (I do look younger than I am.  I do!)
  10. A stranger complements you on your style (Stalker alert!!!!)
  11. Tucking into a bar of chocolate (Guilt trip ahead!)
  12. Being asked where you bought something (Ah come on.  Random or what?  Everyone knows the answer to that one: PENNEYS!!!!)
  13. Catching up with old friends (Less of the old! So I’m “catching up” and they’ve all been on holiday and I haven’t.  Their kids are all in school and mine aren’t.  Some of them are going to the gym that afternoon and the cinema at the weekend and I’m not etc. etc.  Should have stayed at home! )
  14. Fitting into an outfit you thought was too small (Ok, that’s your second freebie)
  15. Reading a brilliant book (But it ends!!!!  They all do!)
  16. Having clean teeth (Because you don’t have clean teeth every day?  Twice a day?  Who made up this quiz?)  
  17. Having a meal cooked for you (Don’t know about you but beans on toast isn’t a meal.  *Sorry, dear* Now, if it was a baked fillet of salmon with miso dressing from Lemongrass………)
  18. Shopping (Who has money for “shopping?”  I take it, Quiz Master, you are not talking about the weekly shop?  Didn’t think so!)
  19. Someone notices you’ve had your hair done (Proper order!!!  I have just had it done.)
  20. A proper hug from your son/daughter (I get those every day.  Several times. *still nice though*)
  21. Getting dressed up for a night out (Maybe another freebie)
  22. A sale in your favourite shop (See no. 6 above.  And that’s cheating.  You’ve repeated yourself!)
  23. Being told your children are well behaved or clever (Who says they’re not?  Come on then????)
  24. A bubble bath (Not unless there are chocolates, candles and wine.  And Serious Alone Time)
  25. Seeing a new play / exhibition (Not for me, thanks)
  26. Buying a new bottle of perfume (Another no.  My signature scent is eau de Mammy)
  27. Going out for lunch with friends (Tut tut. Another double up.  See no. 13 for same question but worded differently)
  28. Winning a debate (I’m talented like that!)
  29. Getting praise from the boss (How condescending of you!!)
  30. A child thanks you for having them to tea (Yeah, that’s a nice one, alright.  Ok, another one in the hat)
  31. A spa day (No. 24.  Come on!)
  32. Exercise / playing sport (Yes!  At last!  Just when you were beginning to think I’m a difficult cow)
  33. Showing off a new handbag (Right, I’m taking those brownie points straight back!  FFS!)
  34. The DJ plays your favourite song on a night out (Yeah, not bad.  Not bad)
  35. Watching a box set (Is it MacGyver?  Coz if it’s not…………..)
  36. Your children are doing well at school / sport (Now you’re gettin’ the idea!)
  37. Taking heels off at the end of the night (hmmm.  I know what you mean but taking them off usually means the night is over and I have to go back to reality. 
  38. Recycling clothes (Maybe.  But only because I’ve managed to clear some clutter.  Altruistic?  Me?)
  39. Eating cheese (Chocolate cheese?  Who gets a feel good buzz from eating cheese?)
  40. Doing a great job at work (See no’s. 20, 23 & 30.  I always do a great job at my work)

What are your favourite Feel Good Factors?  Just one will do.      

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